Hallelujah
Dear Everyone,
It’s me, Emaciated Lady. I’m so grateful for Skinny, who’s been covering for me in my absence, and I apologize to those who depend on us for a daily dose of cynicism. But I promise you, there’s nothing scarier than a fat anorexic and you’ll thank me someday for keeping my distance. Skinny Lady outed me today and now that you all know I started smoking again, I’m confident that I’ll get skinny in no time and help be your inspiration. In 38 days, Skinny is going to be by my side and I need to impress her with a wardrobe that doesn’t include spandex. Skinny, this is for you.
Oh also, most of my blogging inspiration comes from my ridiculously obese coworker and I feel guilty writing about her because she’s a kind person. And I don’t want to get fired for being a mean bitch.
Kindest Regards,
Emaciated (not so much) Lady
4 comments
I will join you emaciated (to be) lady. My inspiration is looking at my reflection in the mirror. I can’t wait to be stick thin again. LOVE YOU!
Love,
Superficial b!tch
Oooh dearest emaciated! Welcome home! We missed you. So glad to hear you are recovering from your terrible illness that i myself am recovering from (fatness). I’m sure with some love from the bloggers and alot of puffing you will look like a twig in no time!
Oh, dear Emacited, you have been missed so much…so happy to see you posting and looking forward to the great hilarity the will ensue when you and Skinny meet up. Meanwhile…don’t be such a stranger…no matter what shape you are in…and i bet you are s t i l l Emaciated Lady!
I’m glad you’ll be back. As long as the coworker never finds your blog… and you don’t mention her by name or to anyone who knows who she is… then no harm is really done!
I used to write all the time on livejournal about my fat roommate, even though I love her to death. If she ever found out, I’d cry and hug her and be so so sorry to cause her hurt… but those chances are nil, and meanwhile I need to get my thoughts out in the open! She never seems to eat – and when she sits down to dinner with us, eats like an anorexic would: picking and nibbiling and pushing food around. It’s so vexing that she is overweight! Obviously I’m unable to keep silent about it (as evidenced) and would just explode one day and scream WHEN DO YOU EAT at her if I didn’t have this outlet.
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