Category — Uncategorized

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but you are a sad specimen of physical health and fitness.”

- Skinny Man, not more than an hour after enjoying a feast of quinoa stuffed bell peppers I made exclusively for him. Next time I’ll remember to add a little rat poison.

Extra Large Man finally had enough of making daily trips to fetch my wine. Yesterday, he came home with a cheap gallon of chianti. He’s convinced it’s going to last me all week.

I wonder if they’d pay me extra if I sent in photos of my buffalo wings too.

Muffin Top Photo Needed Get $250 (West Los Angeles)

Date: 2009-10-23, 2:35PM PDT
Reply to: jennifer@zyatonix.com [Errors when replying to ads?]

We are a diet pill company and we are doing a new ad for one of our new diet pills. We need a photo of a girl
in jeans with her stomach hanging out over the top of the jeans, this is commonly called a muffin top. This is a mid – body shot. We don’t need your face.
If you are interested please let us know we would like to take your photo ASAP! Our Office is on the corner of Pico and Robertson.
Please email a sample photo to jennifer@zyatonix.com
We can email you some example photos showing what kind of pictures we are looking to take.

Location: West Los Angeles
Compensation: $250
Principals only. Recruiters, please don’t contact this job poster.
Please, no phone calls about this job!
Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.

Obese Inmate Hides Gun Under Flabs of Flesh
KTLA News

HOUSTON — An obese inmate in Texas has been charged after officials learned he had a gun hidden under flabs of his own flesh.

Twenty-five-year-old George Vera was charged with possession of a firearm in a correctional facility after he told a guard at the Harris County Jail about the unloaded 9mm pistol.

The Houston Chronicle reported Thursday that Vera was originally arrested on charges of selling illegal copies of compact discs.

The 500-pound man was searched during his arrest and again at a city jail and the county jail, but officers never found the weapon in his rolls of skin.

Vera admitted having the gun during a shower break at the county jail.

Yesterday, Mr. Emaciated asked me how Skinny Lady and I can possibly think of blog ideas on a daily basis. Easy. A decade of pent up dialogue about fat people gives us the inspiration we need today.